Yesterday, I proudly announced to my wife: “No kitchen today.” I thought I was being the hero — breakfast and dinner taken care of with parcel food, and for lunch, I even took them out to a nice hotel. What could possibly go wrong?

Well, everything.

The plan started fine. My wife ordered a soup. I went with humble sambar rice. My daughter confidently chose mini meals. So far, so good.

Then the plot twisted. My wife ordered a veg biryani. Since the biryani arrived quicker than expected, she passed it to my daughter. Next thing I knew, I was already full but somehow ended up sharing sambar rice, curd rice, coconut rice, and biryani — all mixed on one plate — and handing it back to my wife, who was still sipping her soup.

Her reaction? Pot shots.
Apparently, her carefully planned lunch looked like a crazy cocktail, and I was somehow to blame for it. Never mind that I hadn’t ordered half the food. Never mind that I was the one who actually planned the “no kitchen day.” Never mind that I turned chauffeur and host all in one.

It got me thinking — when will wives ever recognize husbands? And if not recognize, can they at least say nothing?

But then again, maybe this is the hidden rule of marriage: no good deed goes unpunished, especially if it involves food.