In Indian arranged marriages, your first meeting with your future wife often happens in a temple, surrounded by her relatives and yours, all watching closely. When I first met my wife like this, I didn’t make any big promises. I just told her honestly that entrepreneurship was my passion and that I would need her extra support to succeed.
She agreed. We got married. And for the first six years, it felt like life had blessed us. The business was thriving, money was flowing, and the house was filled with laughter. In those days, support was easy because success made everything look shiny.
But the real test of any relationship isn’t when you’re flying high — it’s when you crash.
When business challenges started piling up, everything changed. Debts, setbacks, betrayals — my dream began to crumble, and with it, so did the sense of security in our home.
Yet, she stood by me. She didn’t pack her bags or run away. In fact, after an eight-year career gap spent raising our kids, she took up a job to support the family. That move alone deserves more respect than any applause I’ve ever received in my entrepreneurial journey.
But support has layers. While she stood strong on the outside, inside there were storms. She wanted me to take up a job, to drop the dream, to “be practical” for the sake of the family. There were fights, emotional distance, and moments when we felt like strangers living under the same roof.
From her side, it made sense. She saw stability as love, and she believed protecting the kids from uncertainty was her duty. From her view, why should anyone hold on to a passion so stubbornly when it meant risking everything?
From my side, quitting wasn’t an option. Entrepreneurship wasn’t a hobby — it was who I am. If I gave up on it, I wouldn’t just lose a business; I would lose myself. I believed true happiness can exist even in simplicity or poverty, as long as you’re true to your soul’s calling.
I often asked myself: *Who is cruel here? Who is right?*
The truth is, neither of us was wrong. We were just two people trying to survive in our own ways. She fought for emotional and financial security; I fought for identity and purpose.
Marriage is often painted as a journey of compromise. But sometimes, it’s a silent negotiation between two very different worlds: passion and practicality.
She may never fully understand why I chose to stay on this rocky path. And I may never fully understand her fear of instability. But in those differences, there’s a story of two people who didn’t give up on each other — even when they didn’t fully agree.
Tag: entrepreneurship
The “Common Enemy Effect” in Founder Relationships
The common enemy effect is a powerful social phenomenon: people unite strongly when they share a common threat. We often see it in military units, sports teams, and political movements — and it’s equally true for founders and startup teams.
Phase 1: The early struggle
When founders start out, they face huge external threats:
- Market rejection
- Cash burn
- Pressure to prove themselves
- Family or societal doubt
Their common enemy is failure itself. This shared threat aligns them deeply. There’s no time for ego; decisions are fast and collective. Emotional support is strong. They feel like warriors in the same trench.
Phase 2: Early wins and success
Then comes funding, product traction, revenue, or media buzz. Suddenly, the “enemy” that held them together begins to fade.
Without that shared fight, founders start:
- Claiming credit individually
- Listening to “proxy teams” or external voices that inflate egos
- Pushing personal agendas
The urgent need to survive is gone, so the cracks appear.
Phase 3: Gaps widen
When the common threat disappears:
- Misaligned visions surface
- Egos grow
- Trust erodes
- Silent power struggles begin
The same founders who once pulled all-nighters together may now fight over direction, credit, or influence.
Lessons from research
✅ Ben Horowitz (The Hard Thing About Hard Things): In crises, teams unite; in safety, they splinter.
✅ Patrick Lencioni (The Five Dysfunctions of a Team): Without a shared mission, conflict thrives.
✅ Harvard Business Review: “Shared existential threats unify.” New shared missions are critical as you grow.
✅ Social Identity Theory (Tajfel & Turner): Strong group identity often needs an external “enemy” to stay focused.
What can founders do?
- Constantly define new “enemies” or big missions (new markets, innovations, tougher impact goals).
- Regularly revisit and realign personal and collective visions.
- Watch out for external influences that inflate individual egos.
- Build a culture where mission > individuals, always.
In short
What unites founders at first? A common enemy (failure, survival).
What causes splits later? The enemy fades, egos rise.
What’s the fix? Keep creating new shared battles to stay united.
Why the Safe Route Looks Easy, But the Wild Route Feels Right
I’ve often sat at my desk late into the night, staring at the ceiling and asking myself the same question: Why do opportunities seem to pass me by? I risked it all. I worked long hours that blurred into days, pawned my wealth, missed family events, and took responsibility when no one else would even step up. Meanwhile, job goers clocked in their neat 10-hour shifts, played safe, saved their salaries, bought flats, and went home to sleep peacefully. Some even quit when things got tough, never bothering to look back. And today, they seem more “settled” than me. It almost feels unfair. But life isn’t a cricket match with a clear scoreboard. It’s more like a marathon with different routes — some smooth, some with hidden potholes.
The curse (and gift) of taking responsibility
When you take responsibility, you don’t just carry tasks; you carry dreams — yours and everyone else’s. You become the cushion when things go wrong, the cheerleader when hope runs out, and the punching bag when blame needs a home. You can’t play safe. You can’t say, “It’s not my problem.” You’re too busy turning fires into candles.
Why the hustler looks inconsistent
I used to think I was inconsistent. But looking back, I realize I wasn’t inconsistent — I was simply overloaded. When you’re fighting battles on ten fronts, you lose focus on the main goal. You build, break, restart, pivot. From the outside, it looks like a lack of discipline. From the inside, it’s a survival dance.
Why job goers win small but steady
Job goers? They stuck to one lane. They focused only on their paycheck, not the company’s future. They didn’t risk sleepless nights thinking about client payments or the next big move. They followed a simple formula: do the job, save, buy a house, take a vacation, repeat. And you know what? There’s nothing wrong with that.
But then, what about us?
We choose the path of impact, not just income. We choose unpredictability over comfort. We play the game knowing that some days, the scoreboard doesn’t even exist. We’re not inconsistent — we’re experimental. We’re not unlucky — we’re learning resilience the hard way. We’re not behind — we’re building stories that will echo beyond bank statements.
Job goers may retire with a pension; you’ll retire with a legacy. Choose your prize.
In the end, life isn’t about collecting steady paychecks or safe medals. It’s about staying in the arena, even when the crowd goes silent.
How to Become an Entrepreneur in 2025: Build Slow, Play Smart
I started my entrepreneurial journey back when internet cafes were still a thing, and valuation was a word only VCs in Silicon Valley threw around. In 2025, the startup game looks fancier, faster, and full of noise — but the fundamentals remain timeless.
Let’s break it down.
Motivation: Why do you really want to do this?
If your motivation is just to quit your boss, show off on LinkedIn, or post those “hustle harder” selfies — stop right here.
Entrepreneurship is about solving a problem you deeply care about, and having the stomach for months (or years) of invisible effort before the first clap.
Bootstrapping: Start with your own shoes
Bootstrapping isn’t just a funding method; it’s a mindset. You learn to be scrappy, resourceful, and ruthless about where every rupee or dollar goes.
Options to bootstrap in 2025:
- Freelancing or consulting on the side.
- Using small grants or local government innovation funds.
- Partnering with customers to prepay (advance orders).
- Running micro MVPs (minimal products) and using those profits to fuel growth.
Networking: Find ideas, co-founders & allies
Don’t just scroll startup hashtags.
- Attend local meetups, online communities (like Indie Hackers, Founder Clubs), and industry events.
- Discuss problems, not pitches — the right co-founder or investor loves problem-solvers, not wannabe unicorn hunters.
- Build trust slowly, especially if your co-founder isn’t a sibling or lifelong friend.
Sales & branding: Story first, scale next
In 2025, every customer has a 5-second attention span. Your brand is your story.
- Solve one problem well, not ten problems “sort of.”
- Build organic brand trust before performance marketing splurges.
- Don’t just sell products — sell why you exist.
Opportunities: 2025 is gold for niche plays
- Hyper-local services (think “Swiggy for home-cooked elders’ meals”)
- AI-powered micro SaaS tools
- Regional content & commerce
- Sustainability products (waste management, zero-waste packaging)
- Health-tech and affordable wellness
Valuation rush vs. slow & steady
People today worship those “raised $50M in Series A” posts. But most don’t realize — those founders are married to investors now.
Conventional way (slow and steady):
- Build solid foundation.
- Focus on profits.
- Cement market trust.
Unconventional way (valuation-focused):
- Rapid user acquisition.
- Burn money to dominate quickly.
- Aim for big exit or IPO.
💬 Which is ideal?
If you’re building with trusted partners (like siblings or lifelong friends) → Conventional. You think long-term, family legacy, steady cash flows.
If you’re building with a convenience-based co-founder (someone you met for skills, not soul) → Unconventional might work. Faster exits, cashing out before personal values clash.
Dos & Don’ts
✅ Do:
- Focus on one clear customer problem.
- Keep costs lower than your ego.
- Build systems before scaling.
❌ Don’t:
- Build just for investor applause.
- Ignore mental and physical health.
- Copy trends blindly.
Benefits of being an entrepreneur
- You own your time (even if it feels like your startup owns you at first).
- You create impact beyond your payslip.
- You choose your tribe — employees, partners, customers.
- You grow faster as a person than in any corporate boardroom.
In 2025 or 2055, the game is still the same: solve real problems, stay true to your “why,” and play your own game — not someone else’s scoreboard.
Real Stories: Bootstrapping Journeys from Small Towns
When we think of startups, we often imagine glass offices in Bengaluru or pitch nights in Silicon Valley. But some of the most inspiring entrepreneurial journeys are quietly brewing in small towns, far from boardrooms and jargon-filled investor decks.
I’ve seen this firsthand founders building from cramped rooms above grocery stores, farms turned into offices, or small-town cafes with spotty Wi‑Fi and big dreams.
In small towns, bootstrapping isn’t a strategy but it’s the only way. There are no angel investors for coffee meetings or accelerators handing out capital. You depend on savings, supportive family, and a handful of believers.
The unfair advantage of small-town founders
Big-city entrepreneurs chase valuations and media hype. Small-town founders build sustainably — and by necessity. They stretch every rupee, barter for services, and play ten roles at once.
They teach themselves no-code tools. They learn social media marketing on YouTube at 2 a.m. They walk through local markets to gather feedback with humility and curiosity.
Stories that stay with me
I’m inspired by Nishita Vasanth and Priyashri Mani, co-founders of Hoopoe on a Hill, based in Kodaikanal. Since 2015, they’ve grown from sourcing wild honey from local Adivasi (Palaiyan) tribes in the Palani Hills to creating a full-fledged organic brand — including honey, beeswax wraps, and crayons — while empowering over 100 tribal families across 12 villages. Bootstrapped with ₹5 lakh–10 lakh, Hoopoe thrives on small-town efficiency, using India Post for logistics and employing local women in sustainable production. They prove you can build impactful, community-driven, profitable ventures — without chasing investor headlines.
Then there’s Ram Prasath, founder and CEO of Zaaroz, from Chidambaram. In 2018, he and his childhood friend Jayasimhan launched Zaaroz as a local food delivery app. But they didn’t stop at just meals — they expanded to deliver groceries, medicines, fruits, vegetables, meat, and even stationery across 36 tier-2 and tier-3 towns. Zaaroz has completed over 13 lakh deliveries with 400+ delivery executives. What started as a bootstrapped venture with just ₹30 lakh grew into a massive hyperlocal logistics network before they even considered raising funds. Only later did they secure ₹7 crore in funding — after they had already built a solid foundation.
The mindset difference
Small-town entrepreneurs don’t ask, “How soon can I exit?” Instead, they think, “How can I grow this so my community thrives?” They monitor daily cash flow, not social media vanity metrics. They chase satisfied customers, not valuations.
Why bootstrapping builds better character
Every setback hurts. Every win inspires. You learn resilience, patience, and the ultimate currency: resourcefulness. You build relationships because you know you’ll rely on them tomorrow.
A thought for aspiring founders
Don’t wait for perfect funding or polished pitches. Start where you are — with what you have. The market doesn’t care where you began; it cares what problem you solve and how well you solve it.
In small towns, they don’t raise funds first; they raise hopes, hustle, and heart.
In the end, bootstrapping isn’t just about building a business — it’s about building you.
Startups Then & Now: From Empty Streets to Crowded Highways
I started my entrepreneurial ride back in 2000.
Those days, we didn’t even call it a “startup.” We called it “business,” “consultancy,” or just “trying something on my own.”
There was no Shark Tank. No glossy LinkedIn posts with #hustle. No college workshops on “How to pitch to VCs.”
In 2000, entrepreneurship wasn’t a cool badge. It was something you did if you couldn’t find a job or if you were just stubborn enough to believe you could create something from nothing.
2000: Wild, open roads
- No references for success. The word “startup” was so rare, only one in a lakh even dared to dream it.
- Loyalty was real. Your first hire stayed not just for salary but for the dream, even if the office was a one-room setup with plastic chairs and Maaza bottles in the fridge.
- Markets were raw. Everything was new and waiting. A simple website could make you look like a global player.
- Corporates & tech were immature. Big companies were still figuring out email, and many had no clue how to use the internet beyond sending scanned copies of invoices.
- Open source was magic. You could build a product for the price of a few nights of filter coffee.
- Ecosystem? Nil. No accelerators, no pitch fests, no “startup India” subsidies. Just you, your idea, and sheer guts.
- Limited resources, big possibilities. Everything felt like a blank canvas.
2025: Crowded highways
- Startup became a fashion statement. Every Tom, Dick, and Harry wants to “launch something” — sometimes just to add “Founder” to their Instagram bio.
- Expensive game. Startups today mean burn rates, seed funding rounds, CAC vs LTV debates — even before you have your first paying customer.
- No loyalty. Employees switch for a ₹2,000 raise or a fancier “Head of Vibe” title.
- Tech consolidation. The top 5 tech giants dictate tools, languages, and frameworks. Your “freedom to build” has a Terms & Conditions page.
- Market consolidation. Big sharks have gobbled up fragmented small players. Niches get crushed before you even announce your beta.
- Ecosystem overload. Events, podcasts, awards, startup conferences. Everyone is “networking,” but very few are really building.
- Too many eyes, less patience. Today, if your product doesn’t go viral in 2 weeks, you’re labeled a flop.
Then vs Now: What’s the real deal?
In 2000, the road was empty and scary.
In 2025, the road is crowded and noisy.
Then, the challenge was survival in the unknown.
Now, the challenge is standing out in the overcrowded known.
Then, it was about creating a market.
Now, it’s about finding your slot in a saturated market.
Then, you worried about paying your first employee on time.
Now, you worry if your pitch deck slides have enough “impact words.”
But here’s the one thing that hasn’t changed:
The thrill of chasing a vision that only you can see.
Whether you’re hustling on a dusty internet café PC in 2000 or pitching on a Zoom call in 2025 — the soul of entrepreneurship remains the same:
A quiet voice inside that whispers, “Let’s try anyway.“
“Markets change. Tech evolves. But courage? That stays timeless.”
The Silent War After Failure
I used to think failure was about numbers like losing money, shutting down a company, or missing targets. But real failure? It’s when you lose yourself.
After my own setback, I noticed something strange. It wasn’t just that I didn’t have work. It was that I couldn’t feel like working anymore. The spark that once lit me up like brainstorming at midnight, building teams, scaling products — it didn’t even create a flicker inside me.
I kept asking myself: Why can’t I just pick up something small and start? Why can’t I push through?
The truth hit me like a late-night punch: I had evolved. What excited me before simply didn’t feel meaningful anymore.
When you’ve built something big, your mind builds an invisible yardstick. You unconsciously measure every new idea against your past success. You remember the energy of a big team, the rush of growth charts, the adrenaline of new hires and expansions.
Now, when you try to start something small — a side gig, a consulting call, a tiny digital product — it feels like throwing pebbles after you’ve once launched rockets. You feel silly, almost embarrassed to call it “work.”
But it doesn’t stop there. Your entire identity gets woven into your career. Your “I am” statement was always followed by what you built or led. When that structure crumbles, it cracks you right at the core. You’re not just jobless; you feel nameless.
The worst part? You can’t even explain it to anyone. Friends and family might say, “Do something small! Just start anywhere!” They mean well. But they don’t realize you’re battling an invisible ghost inside — a ghost that constantly whispers, “You’re not enough anymore.”
I lived this. Every single hour felt heavy, every day felt like pushing through fog. I knew I should act, but the energy just wasn’t there.
I’m still figuring it out. I don’t have a grand conclusion yet. Maybe one day I will.
Sometimes the hardest comeback isn’t in the world outside — it’s in the quiet corner of your mind where your old self still lives.
Big Decisions in My Life!!!
Since the time I started my career I had been put under a lot of situations to travel the path of normal life…
Frankly I was not OK in being a common man… I wanted to take The Road Less Traveled and make an impact…
So, I’m fortunate enough to come across tough situations and had to take a lot of big decisions to come across the odds…
Becoming an Entrepreneur: I’ve written it many times but let me tell it again… I had to overcome emotional pressure from my parents, no experience, no financial support and no mentors… It was criticism from all corners…
Breaking up of Partnership: Had to break a eight year partnership where I had to forgo a company I started…
Launching CCS: Started this company immediately after quitting from my previous venture… This was something started with the pain points of previous venture… Again no investment and it was a purely & professionally bootstrapped company…
Launching CT: It is version 2.0 of my previous venture… Launched it after getting peanuts as settlement..
Handling Legal Issues: For almost two years I had to face legal issues from my previous venture’s stakeholders… Facing the legal challenges has taught me how to handle things legally in India..
Breaking my Engagement: This is one decision which puts me into guilt sometimes… But we have to take some decision to avoid unnecessary complication after marriage… In fact that was a part of life where I thought if entrepreneurs are fit to get married..
Reinventing my Technology Business: Wanted to change the culture of the company and brought in a new CTO… Within a year the entire company collapsed expect my CTO & me… We again started it from the scratch and rebuilt the team as well as the company…
All the above things were big decisions in my life which I faced it and survived it!!
The key to success!!!
Knowingly or Unknowingly all my business ventures have been launched before I ready!!
My first venture Agriya;
- It was started even before I was out of college!!!
- Never possessed any technical or interpersonal skills!!!
- Could call myself a fresher entrepreneur!!
This was a turning point not in my life but also for a bunch of friends and acquaintances who started their own ventures looking at the success of my first venture!!!
My second venture People Justice Magazine!!!
- Started at the age of 24!!!
- No idea on how to run a magazine and that too a Tamil one!!!
- No expertise on collecting news!!!
- No experience in editorial!!!
The venture failed as I was not full time into it!!! Also the team I formed didn’t connect with the vision I carried!!! I wanted to go digital during 2005 and the team collapsed for the same reason!!! Today it would have been a great if we have changed!!! Anyway the learnings and connects it gave me was stupendous!!! Also we were able to print magazines for 2 years!!!
My third venture Cogzidel Technologies!!!
- Started at a time I was broke mentally and monetarily!!!
- Was running through multiple legal battles!!!
- Wanted to take a spiritual break but couldn’t!!!
Still running the Show!!! Not reached the heights I anticipated!!! But able to run so far and I’m ready to take a great leap!!
My third venture Cogzidel Consultancy Services!!!
- Started at a time I was broke mentally and monetarily!!!
- Was running through multiple legal challenges!!!
- Wanted to take a spiritual break but couldn’t!!!
- No idea on what to do & how to do with this venture!!
- Just started with my pain points but was lacking the operation knowledge!!!
- My partner Bala was lacking the business knowledge and he was not ready too!!!
Today this company is our identity in India!!! Almost every Startups in Chennai should be aware of CCS!!! In less than a year we got the business & operational knowledge and we are working on great things!!!
My fourth venture Movie Production!!!
- Didn’t know anything about the industry!!!
- Didn’t have any capital when we started!!!
The movie flopped miserably!!! But I wouldn’t consider it a loss as it was a crowd funded movie and the loss can be substantiated for the experience of being associated with the industry!!!
Also can’t call it a failure yet as I’m on a sabbatical and planning to venture back!! This time not as a producer but as a distributor!!!
But in every case I was not ready with Capital or Experience or Knowledge or Team or any other aspects… But as I perceived everything fell in line and things happened!!!
So, I’d tell anyone running behind SUCCESS to blindly believe in the quote!!
THE KEY TO SUCCESS IS TO START BEFORE YOU’RE READY!!!
Been through these Phases
I’ve personally experienced these phases and saw fit for want to be entrepreneurs to frame it in their drawing room!!
This is why you must not give up;
- You haven’t tried everything!!
- You are closer to success than you think!!
- If you don’t finish, then someone would!!
- Right before success there is a dark phase!!
- You will never regret trying until the end!!
- It’s better to die trying than giving up!!
- Past failure does not predict the future!!
- As long as you are alive, anything is still possible!!!
AnandNataraj 