When Help Comes with a Cost

There’s no denying that receiving help from someone who genuinely cares about you is a wonderful feeling. It can give you a sense of security and comfort knowing that you have someone you can turn to when you need it the most. However, what happens when that help comes with a cost?

When someone offers you help, it’s natural to assume that they have your best interests at heart. However, what if that help comes with unsolicited advice, constant nagging, and a complete disregard for your boundaries? What do you do then?

It’s easy to feel trapped in a situation like this, especially when the person helping you has been a lifeline during your time of need. But, it’s important to remember that just because someone helps you, it doesn’t give them the right to overstep your boundaries or ignore your wishes.

Setting boundaries with someone who has helped you can be challenging. The first step is to recognize that you have the right to set boundaries and that it’s essential for your mental health and well-being. If someone is making you feel uncomfortable or is causing you distress, it’s important to communicate that to them in a respectful manner.

However, sometimes, despite our best efforts, the other person may not be willing to listen. In situations like these, it’s essential to seek outside help. Talk to a trusted friend who can offer you guidance and support.

Last but not least, receiving help from someone is a beautiful thing, but it should never come with a price. It’s essential to recognize your boundaries and communicate them effectively to the person helping you. If they continue to ignore your boundaries despite your efforts, it’s important to seek outside help. Always remember that you have the right to live your life on your terms, and no one has the right to take that away from you.


Dealing with a Contradictory and Boastful Friend: A Nightmare

Have you ever come across someone who always seems to contradict everything you say, has an opinion on everything, and thinks they know everything better than you do? I certainly have, and his pseudonym is Solamuthan.

Solamuthan is a unique personality who always seems to think that his way is the best way. He can make the mood of the entire room go sour with his constant need to contradict and argue with everyone. He loves to boast about his own talent, and hearing him sing his own praises is incredibly irritating.

If you suggest going to one location, he’ll insist on going to another and argue why his choice is better than yours. The same goes for hotels; he’ll always recommend another one in the opposite direction. If you take one path when driving, he’ll suggest a detour and a different route.

Accompanying Solamuthan to hotels is a nightmare. He always complains about the food and will pick a fight with the serving staff. I always fear getting into an argument with the hotel staff, as their frustration with the situation might show in the food they serve us. Yet, he continues to complain and argue with everyone.

It’s surprising how such a person has built a false sense of hype around himself despite being ridiculed by many. Solamuthan’s constant need to contradict and argue with everyone may stem from a deep-seated insecurity or a desire to assert his dominance in the conversation. Unfortunately, this behavior only serves to alienate him from others and make him difficult to be around

Dealing with a Boomer Uncle: Lessons Learned from My Friend’s Experience

We all have that one friend who always seems to depend on us for everything, but creates a narrative that we are dependent on them. They tell everyone how our lives would be without them, and act like they are the center of our universe. I have such a friend, and I have named him Boomer Ungle in my blog posts.

Boomer Ungle is the quintessential advice-giver. He has an opinion on everything, from how to do business to how to manage my personal relationships. He tells me why I failed in my ventures, and how I can do better next time. He even tells me how I should raise my children, and how I should interact with my spouse. In short, he has an advice for everything, and he’s not shy about sharing it with me and everyone else around.

At first, I used to get irritated with his constant advice-giving. I felt like he was trying to impose his views on me, and I resented that. But over time, I realized that his behavior was more about him than it was about me. He needed to feel important, and he did that by making me feel like I needed him.

It’s ironic that Boomer Ungle sees himself as the one who is indispensable to me, because the truth is that I don’t really need him. Yes, he’s been a friend for a long time, and we’ve shared some good times together. But I don’t rely on him for anything, and I don’t feel like my life would be significantly worse without him.

In fact, whenever Boomer Ungle starts his narrative about how much I depend on him, I can’t help but laugh. I find it amusing that he can’t see the truth, and that he has to create a story to make himself feel important.

But despite all of this, I’ve come to accept Boomer Ungle for who he is. I don’t take his advice seriously, but I listen to it with a sense of detachment. I recognize that he’s trying to be helpful, even if his advice is often misguided.

And so, I’ve decided to call him Boomer Ungle in my blog posts. It’s a term that captures his essence, and it’s become a running joke among my friends. They all know who I’m talking about when I use that term, and they often chuckle at the mention of it.

In the end, Boomer Ungle is just another part of my life. He’s not the most important part, but he’s there, and he’s a reminder that we all have quirks and idiosyncrasies that make us who we are. And even though he may drive me crazy at times, I’m glad to have him as a friend.

How Lending Money Killed Friendship!!!

I’ve personally experienced this with a classmate of mine. I lent him money when he was in need. I had to nag him to get that money back. Though he repaid that money in instalments, he cut all sort of communication with me!!!

When I came across this quote it remainder my personal experience… Also I believe most of them would have experienced this 🙂

I had my money and my friend!!!
I gave my money to my friend!!!
I asked my money from my friend!!
I lost my money and my friend!!

STOP Advising Folks!!!!

Yesterday went for weekend bash to my friends house… Right from the first go it was ADVISE!!! ADVISE!!! ADVISE!!! from a very close friend of mine… Am sorry to make a post complaining about my own close buddy…

I know you care for me my friend… But you don’t care if others are comfortable, how yow are putting the person you care into situation & how you are intruding their happiness…

  • You are always pessimistic & complaining… You can’t spoil the mood if you are not enjoying…
  • You advice for once in a blue moon acts of ours… You get angry if we advise on your genuine things which spoil your health & reputation…

We love you and many situations we never bothered your acts… But I was upset that you screed the weekend which I badly waited for to clear my mind…

I take your advise seriously & wish you reciprocate…

Am Bored & Reasons

Am feeling Bored more often these days because;

– Of shrinking friend base…
– Lack of mental sink with loved ones…
– Doing same task at work for almost a decade…
– Retiring from Sportsmanship…
– Staying away from problems for a long time…
– Transformation from dis-obedient to Obedient son…

Considering all the listed points. I think change in my behaviour & character makes me feel bored.

It is strange because people hated me when I was myself but I enjoyed. Today they like me but am not enjoying it.

Should I be myself ignoring others? Or make others happy & keep feeling bored?

Why do we need close Friends?

For long time I’ve wondered why we need close friends? I’ve thought what i’m missing these days & I got an answer through an SMS forward…

For those honest opinions..!
To pick us from the airport at 2 am..!
To kick us at midnight on our birthday..!
To make fun of our new outfits..!
To get the latest prints of movies..!
To call at 3 am just to say goodnight..!
To listen to us when everyone else is yelling at us..!
To just walk without any reason!
For the endless treats!
To irritate us with missed calls when we are sleeping!

Are we acting?

Yesterday didn’t plan much to spend some time with my friend. As usual i slept long and started the day by evening. Then I picked my friend and went to Marina beach and from there I took him to a Roof-top restaurant near my house.  We started a formal conversation and after gulping some pegs it became too informal.

I’ve always admired this guy for his self-confidence and enjoying his life to his fullest. He is in his early thirties and still not married. Until yesterday I thought he is pushing his marriage for the sake of his career. Even i strongly believed marriage is a stumbling block for ambitious people like us.

But I was in for a rude shock. This guy on his high confessed that he wanted to get married and he badly needs a companion. I’ve seen a lot for friends who were very desperate for marriage and they have obviously shown that in their behavior.  But this guy has never once he has shown those symptoms.

From then on I was wondering if we are all living a false life? Are we acting?

With this experience I can say we are all living with a masked face…

A Jam Packed Day

Yesterday has been a fulfilling day as it kept me fully engaged which is what a person like me expects. The day started drowsy as usual like every day. I got up by 11 AM and it was normal routine. By 11.45 AM i drove to my office and reached office by 12.15 noon.

Then I started the day with couple of tweets and posted a Blog. Then came my cousin who wants to be a part of my marketing initiative and I took him as a Business Development intern.

I did some mentoring which started with some enlightenment of his current small business and then I took him through his role as an intern. Hope he enjoys working under me.

Got a call from my friend who came to give his marriage invitation. Then spent an hour with him and took him to the house of another friend.

Then retuned to office to pickup another cousin who started an aquarium business and he visited my office to give his consultation on setting up an aquarium in my office.

Then by the end of the day me and Bala thought of going for a movie and we went to Satyam Cinemas and booked a ticket for Kurbaan. As it was only 8 o clock and the show was by 10.30 we thought we could spend the remaining time at Amethyst as Bala has never been there before.

At Amethyst it was as usual a nice atmosphere but the food was really bad. Then this time I was more irated by their behavior. in their menu they has specified their timings as 10 AM – 10 PM.

But instead they started closing the shop by 9.15 and the guy came near us and he switched off the fan without having the courtesy to ask for an excuse. They did all things to drive us out even before 9.30 PM and we came out with frustration.

But we were talking business, cracking jokes and I didn’t want to spoil my mood and I drove till island ground and returned and parked the car at Satyam Annex and we took a walk to theatre.

My expectations we set high on movie as Shiv Sena has said that they are going to send saris to Kareena Kapoor & while getting the tickets we were told it was an adults only movie and we cant take minors.

I thought there would be some adult scenes in the movie and nothing of that sort was shown. All hype created by promos, media and the person issuing tickets ended in disappointing me after the movie got over.

Over all it was a day where I was engaged every minute and I’m happy to close the day.

Good Night!!!